The Irishman (3/5)
Long and meandering, the films third act focuses its thematic point and pivots Scorsese's gangster epic into a more somber and reflective piece.
It Chapter 2 (2/5)
Not as strong or as scary as the first, nevertheless Chapter 2 has stronger moments though they are fewer and further between.
El Camino (1/5)
An unnecessary capstone to Jessie's story which in hindsight may have best been left to the imagination.
Ford v Ferrari (4/5)
Great Sound, great characters, great story. This is why I go to the theater.
Frozen II (1/5)
Tis I with the frozen heart. This chilled sequel has no bite.
Knives Out (4/5)
A relentlessly entertaining ride that's almost as much fun as the cast seems to be having onscreen.
Jumanji: The Next Level (3/5)
Adventure films are scarce at the box office, but the Jumanji movies handle it so by the book you wonder why there aren't more.
Star Wars: The Rise of Skywalker (1/5)
The first poorly made Disney Star Wars movie. Oh well 3/5 is still a winning record in my book.
Spies in Disguise (2/5)
Cruises within its lane but never elevates itself beyond serviceable.
Little Woman (4/5)
Its weaker first hour builds and pays off with some exceptional character moments in the films later acts. Wonderful performances from Ronan, Pugh and Chalarmet.
Bad Boys for Life (2/5)
Not a bad time at the movies, but not what I call a good movie either.
Parasite (5/5)
Like the title would suggest, Bong joon-ho's film has attached itself to my psyche. Every thought I afford it only strengthens its adhesion to me, encouraging deeper exploration of its engrossing screenplay and plentiful visual metaphors. A truly striking film.
Monday, January 27, 2020
Tuesday, November 5, 2019
Jojo Rabbit
Rotten Tomatoes 79% Cinemascore: N/A
Jojo Rabbit incorporates as much insight and thought as it does playfulness and humor while inspecting The Third Reich through the eyes of an impressionable boy. The film is soaked Taika Waititi's signature tone, but is elevated further with a healthy injection of heart and meaning. Jojo Rabbit is a unique sort of coming of age story about a boy coming to terms with the world around him. Roman Griffon Davis excels in the title role. Other standouts include Johansson as Jojo's mother and Rockwell as a handicap officer who oversees Jojo's "community service" (but when is Rockwell ever not excellent). The true standout of Jojo is its screenplay; Waititi casting himself as Hitler is not a tool used to personally poke fun at Nazi absurdism, but a narrative devise used to frame Jojo's own perception of fascist ideology and how it changes throughout the plot. This type of insight and risk in film is not only uncommon, but wholly original in style and tone. Jojo Rabbit is funny, touching, and dark all woven together in harmony; in a phrase its profoundly human. A must see for anyone remotely curious.
Monday, November 4, 2019
Terminator: Dark Fate
Doomed to a Darker fate then Deserved 2/5
The greatest praise I can afford Terminator: Dark Fate is that, at its best, it feels like terminator movie. Clearly more influenced from T2 then Cameron's original 1984 film (as every terminator sequel has been), Dark Fate isn't afraid to take risks in order to cement its identity and establish what a "terminator film" really is. Unfortunately, while one foot dabbles in fresh waters the other remains planted the same mythology the franchise seems desperate to leave behind. Dark Fate is best when focusing on its new cast including new target Dani Ramos (Reyes) and her enhanced protector Grace (Davis) then begins to fall apart once Hamilton as Sarah Connor and Schwartzenegger come into the picture. The film otherwise is a competent action film if a bit over bloated; it's worth a watch if you are curious but likewise a forgivable skip.
Rotten Tomatoes 71% Cinemascore: B+
Wednesday, October 23, 2019
2019 round up so far
Let's just pretend I wrote full 3 paragraph reviews for all these films:
The Lego Movie 2: The Second Part (4/5)
As hysterical and heartfelt as the first Lego Movie. What it lacks in narrative cohesion, it makes up for with ambition and big ideas.
What Men Want (1/5)
Taraji P. you're better then this...at least I hope you are.
Isn't it Romantic (2/5)
Better then average satire of a below average romantic comedy.
Alita: Battle Angel (2/5)
Nails its main character and wows with visuals, the story fumbles through subplot and ends before central questions can be addressed to bait a sequel
Fighting with My Family (3/5)
I don't understand WWE. I like to think I understand what makes a good movie which fortunately Fighting With My Family is.
How to Train Your Dragon: The Hidden World (2/5)
The Hidden World owes its strength to its predecessors. Outside its conclusion, what it brings to the table is underwhelming.
Captain Marvel (2/5)
Its perplexing that this movies signature flaw is its main character, something that marvel has traditional and continues to excel in.
Dumbo (1/5)
Assistant: "Mr. Burton, Disney wants you to remake Dumbo". Burton: "Excellent, time to take that pink elephants scene to the next level". Assistant:" Actually they want you to make a period drama with meta commentary". Burton:"...What?"
Shazam! (3/5)
The sudden and horrific imagery in Shazam! only adds to its light boyish charm and sense of fun the film plays up. Seriously, that's not a joke.
Little (1/5)
Let's make that movie pitched by a tween girl for adults, whats the worst that could happen?
Missing Link (2/5)
Charming and light but I expect more from Laika studios who brought us Kubo, Coraline, and Paranorman.
Penguins (2/5)
You know if Disney Nature Documentaries weren't narrated in the most annoying means possible, they might actually be some of my favorite films of the year.
Avengers: Endgame (2/5)
Great end to the MCU so far, sub par movie in its own right...hate me...hate me for speaking the truth.
Long Shot (2/5)
Pretty decent comedy that feels like it should say more then it does.
Pokemon Detective Pikachu (2/5)
Magnificent production design, great dynamic between leads. Too bad was too bonkers to be taken seriously even for a poke-manic like myself; I guess I expected to much.
The Hustle (1/5)
Yet another example of Anne Hathaway being far too good for the movie shes given.
John Wick: Chapter 3- Parabellum (4/5)
The best John Wick movie ever! A symphony of stunt work and action cinematography.
Aladdin (2/5)
Will Smith really works when he is allowed to do his version of the genie, which comprises about 40% of the time he's allotted on screen.
Booksmart (5/5)
A retelling of Superbad with new things to say. It doesn't hurt it's also the best comedy in years.
Godzilla: King of the Monsters (4/5)
I cried when Mothra tackled Rodan out of the skies.
Rocket Man (3/5)
A typical musical biopic that isn't afraid to take a risk or two into surreal storytelling.
Dark Phoenix (1/5)
Dishonor X-Men. Dishonor on your whole franchise. Dishonor on you, dishonor on your cow...McAvoy and Fassbender get gold stars for trying.
Men in Black: International (1/5)
Where was the heart here!?
Toy Story 4 (2/5)
I recognize the strengths of Toy Story 4 makes it a worthy sequel to the classic (if a bit overrated in my opinion) trilogy, but that doesn't excuse how bored I was throughout the second act.
Yesterday (3/5)
A great what if narrative that plays out as predictably as you expect and ends just after it wore out its welcome.
Spider-Man: Far From Home (3/5)
Its second half makes good on the themes its disposable first half introduces, helping the movie stand just under the average Marvel anthology.
Stuber (2/5)
If you listen carefully you can hear Kumail's comedic muscles seizing after carrying Batista for the 90min runtime.
The Lion King (2/5)
It's the Lion King. Its also a Disney "live action" remake which means its vastly inferior to the original and only adds material that seemingly improves the narrative but only diminishes the pacing and themes.
Once Upon A Time in Hollywood (3/5)
Tarantino's historical embellishment is best watched like a day in the life experience rather then a traditional narrative up to the final 20 min.
Joker (4/5)
Phillips doesn't have as much to say in Joker as he think he does, but what he does say is effective and most certainly worth talking about.
The Lego Movie 2: The Second Part (4/5)
As hysterical and heartfelt as the first Lego Movie. What it lacks in narrative cohesion, it makes up for with ambition and big ideas.
What Men Want (1/5)
Taraji P. you're better then this...at least I hope you are.
Isn't it Romantic (2/5)
Better then average satire of a below average romantic comedy.
Alita: Battle Angel (2/5)
Nails its main character and wows with visuals, the story fumbles through subplot and ends before central questions can be addressed to bait a sequel
Fighting with My Family (3/5)
I don't understand WWE. I like to think I understand what makes a good movie which fortunately Fighting With My Family is.
How to Train Your Dragon: The Hidden World (2/5)
The Hidden World owes its strength to its predecessors. Outside its conclusion, what it brings to the table is underwhelming.
Captain Marvel (2/5)
Its perplexing that this movies signature flaw is its main character, something that marvel has traditional and continues to excel in.
Dumbo (1/5)
Assistant: "Mr. Burton, Disney wants you to remake Dumbo". Burton: "Excellent, time to take that pink elephants scene to the next level". Assistant:" Actually they want you to make a period drama with meta commentary". Burton:"...What?"
Shazam! (3/5)
The sudden and horrific imagery in Shazam! only adds to its light boyish charm and sense of fun the film plays up. Seriously, that's not a joke.
Little (1/5)
Let's make that movie pitched by a tween girl for adults, whats the worst that could happen?
Missing Link (2/5)
Charming and light but I expect more from Laika studios who brought us Kubo, Coraline, and Paranorman.
Penguins (2/5)
You know if Disney Nature Documentaries weren't narrated in the most annoying means possible, they might actually be some of my favorite films of the year.
Avengers: Endgame (2/5)
Great end to the MCU so far, sub par movie in its own right...hate me...hate me for speaking the truth.
Long Shot (2/5)
Pretty decent comedy that feels like it should say more then it does.
Pokemon Detective Pikachu (2/5)
Magnificent production design, great dynamic between leads. Too bad was too bonkers to be taken seriously even for a poke-manic like myself; I guess I expected to much.
The Hustle (1/5)
Yet another example of Anne Hathaway being far too good for the movie shes given.
John Wick: Chapter 3- Parabellum (4/5)
The best John Wick movie ever! A symphony of stunt work and action cinematography.
Aladdin (2/5)
Will Smith really works when he is allowed to do his version of the genie, which comprises about 40% of the time he's allotted on screen.
Booksmart (5/5)
A retelling of Superbad with new things to say. It doesn't hurt it's also the best comedy in years.
Godzilla: King of the Monsters (4/5)
I cried when Mothra tackled Rodan out of the skies.
Rocket Man (3/5)
A typical musical biopic that isn't afraid to take a risk or two into surreal storytelling.
Dark Phoenix (1/5)
Dishonor X-Men. Dishonor on your whole franchise. Dishonor on you, dishonor on your cow...McAvoy and Fassbender get gold stars for trying.
Men in Black: International (1/5)
Where was the heart here!?
Toy Story 4 (2/5)
I recognize the strengths of Toy Story 4 makes it a worthy sequel to the classic (if a bit overrated in my opinion) trilogy, but that doesn't excuse how bored I was throughout the second act.
Yesterday (3/5)
A great what if narrative that plays out as predictably as you expect and ends just after it wore out its welcome.
Spider-Man: Far From Home (3/5)
Its second half makes good on the themes its disposable first half introduces, helping the movie stand just under the average Marvel anthology.
Stuber (2/5)
If you listen carefully you can hear Kumail's comedic muscles seizing after carrying Batista for the 90min runtime.
The Lion King (2/5)
It's the Lion King. Its also a Disney "live action" remake which means its vastly inferior to the original and only adds material that seemingly improves the narrative but only diminishes the pacing and themes.
Once Upon A Time in Hollywood (3/5)
Tarantino's historical embellishment is best watched like a day in the life experience rather then a traditional narrative up to the final 20 min.
Joker (4/5)
Phillips doesn't have as much to say in Joker as he think he does, but what he does say is effective and most certainly worth talking about.
Maleficent: Mistress of Evil
Rotten Tomatoes 41% Cinemascore: A
Disney's sequel to 2014s Maleficent shares much in common with many of the studios other more original live action films. The visual effects and production are all excellent, however the script and characters are shallow leaving little more then flashy entertainment designed to pacify and instruct its audience how to feel rather than letting them decide for themselves. Mistress of Evil is not devoid of quality, no movie is. The film leans heavily into its dark fantasy aesthetic sparking the imagination with its sets throughout the film, my favorite of which is underground laboratory where creatures from the Moors are experimented on. The greatest tragedy of the film though may be its treatment of its title character played again by Jolie. The narrative refuses to commit to a central conflict to bind Maleficent to, resulting in disorganized pacing as the film marches towards the battle it desperately wants to stage. First the film focuses on Maleficent relationship with her surrogate daughter Aurora (Fanning), then it shifts to Maleficent's own insecurities until it drops that altogether and instead bobs between themes of belonging and acceptance. Then the finale dissatisfies every theme so it may have a classic Disney ending. There is joy to be had in Maleficent's third act as Ronning throws all the fantasy violence on screen he can get away with a PG rating, however the end result was the absence of any theme or character I could ascribe caring for.
Saturday, February 9, 2019
Glass
I liked Glass, even more so that some time has passed. It's hard to overlook the originality and individuality that Shyamalan has injected into this surprise cinematic universe. Glass mirrors many the strengths of Unbreakable and Split making it a treat to watch in pieces. Unfortunately where M. Night's film starts to fracture is when it begins to explore some of its bolder concepts; compound with a lack of subtly takes what could have been a worthy finale to the makeshift trilogy and turns it into a fair but lesser follow up to the previous installments.
Rotten Tomatoes 38% Cinemascore: B+
Saturday, January 12, 2019
Second Act
WTF
Never forget the radioactive Geikgo tree!
Second Act is a very typical wish fulfillment romantic comedy with two equally jaw dropping and head scratching moments to let it stand out (One of which is hinted above). Jennifer Lopez is not an actress and under delivers almost every scene, as does nearly the entire class. It's not offensively bad it doesn't do anything well enoughto call it good.
Rotten Tomatoes 38% Cinemascore: B+
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